Find a little Relationship Va Va Voom
How can we inject a little va va voom into our relationships, instead of going crazy being stuck together day in, day out?
These are strange times we find ourselves in. Our worlds have shrunk, many of us are working from home, our social lives, our hobbies, the enjoyment we take in being social creatures has been interrupted. Many people are experiencing the stress of job uncertainty, possibly financial difficulties, they have created new coping mechanisms, they may be worried about their parents, the impact this is having on their children’s education and social development. These are indeed strange times.
So what on earth is this doing to our personal romantic relationships?
When you have been in a relationship for a while the honeymoon period can very easily wear off, we got bogged down with ‘functional tasks’, such as running the home, looking after family members and living our own lives.
Some of you out there may be lucky and have found news ways to connect with your partner through Lockdown and reignite that spark! Congratulations, some of the hints and tips below might resonant or even supplement your newfound relationship va va voom!
We also recognise that there may be people out there in coercive or abuse relationships who feel trapped and worry for their safety, and for anyone in that position please seek help, you can find a way through with support, your safety is the most important thing – there is help and advice on the NHS website, for both men and women https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/healthy-body/getting-help-for-domestic-violence/
Then for those of us who are simply feeling in the relationship doldrums, spending day after day with the same person with very little other social interaction, We are After the Storm has a few hints and tips to be able to bare another few weeks, maybe even months with your other half without it ending in tears, and you never know you might find a new and fun side to your relationship that will bring back the honeymoon period and help you keep it!
It wont surprise you to hear us say:
Communication is Key! The way we talk to the people we love most in our life is often far worse than how we would talk to a stranger, this is the wrong way round, learn to talk openly, honestly and freely, create a safe place to discuss your niggles and frustrations but equally your hopes, your dreams and maybe even your fantasies!
Find Time! This might sound strange especially as we are together all the time at the moment, but make sure you find time for you and your partner. Break away from the all the functional aspects of life, go for a walk together just the 2 of you. Have a date night at home. Arrange a romantic meal for the 2 of you, get dressed up as if you were going out for the night, if you have children feed them earlier, and if they are old enough, they could even wait your table. Have a games night with forfeits to get you giggling and break the monotony. Chose a film, get some popcorn and nachos and hotdogs and have a night at the movies. All these things will help keep the connection between you alive.
Make Plans! Ok so we don’t know when this will all be over, but it will be over one day, what have you missed doing together, what adventures would you love to go on with our newfound freedom? Plan trips and holidays, or days out and talk about all the fun you will have when you can, it will help create a feeling of hope. But as you do it might even give you ideas for fun things to try in Lockdown within the rules.
Say Thank you! Sometimes we get so wrapped up in ourselves that we don’t open our eyes to see all the things our partner does for us. It might be always doing the recycling, making the bed, fluffing up the cushions on the sofa. It might be bigger things like doing the washing or always cooking or ensuring the house is clear and tidy. Just showing you appreciate that and what they do can have a massive difference on your relationship. Some one who feels appreciated will feel content and want to show their appreciation, and that can only lead to a happier partnership.
Be touchy! Human connect is so important to keep us grounded and happy. In the honeymoon period of a relationship, we might hold hands, cuddle, give each other a little pat on the bum as a we pass and this can so easily be lost as life gets in the way. Try and reintroduce a little bit of the magic, have a cuddle, hold hands on that walk for just the 2 of you. Remember that cheeky little tickles and little snatched kisses help to keep that magic alive and bring back your mojo.
We wish you happiness.